#like benrey can go all BREAK THE GAME and FEEL MY PASSPORT
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i LOOOOVE it when people let tommy be Scary. im OBSESSED. i love it when hes OFF PUTTING and WEIRD.
(bonus: the scariness not being intentional)
#hlvrai#my art#tommy coolatta#i imagine tommy is scary because he stays very quiet and composed#like benrey can go all BREAK THE GAME and FEEL MY PASSPORT#and coomer can go all ATOM BY ATOM#and bubby can. i dont know. have prototypes#spin around in a circle doing dialups#but tommy makes you Sit in the Quiet#he likes to make people wait for him to speak.
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Tangled Up - Chapter One
for I am a tardigrade, and I'll stay at home
Benrey's spent 26 years living in a tower - 27, tomorrow. When a thief breaks into his tower, he finds his chance to escape and takes it.
Alternatively: Tangled, but the AI is self aware.
(featuring art by @kenas-artstuffâ )
Notes: check ao3 for warnings and tags! âkane radioâ is just gordon using a fake name. fic title from âtangled upâ by caro emerald, chapter title from âtardigrade songâ by cosmo sheldrake.
Happy valentines day!!! hope you enjoy <3
AO3 Link
This is not the first time Kaneâs come to tied up. Itâs not even the first time this week. However, it is the first time heâs come to tied up with ropes made of human hair, and the first time heâs come to with a fucking raccoon shoving its nose in his ear.
So maybe he screams a little. Anyone would! Itâs a reasonable reaction.Â
The hair around his wrists is a shiny blue-black, tough when he pulls at it. Is all hair like that? Is it one of those things thatâs fragile individually but super tough all together? Seems like it, because itâs not even budging.
Heâs so caught up that he doesnât notice the person in the shadows until theyâre holding out a crowbar, tilting up his chin.
âYo,â they say, quiet and monotone. âYouâre not supposed to be here.â
Kane screams again.
Theyâre weird looking. Pale, really pale, to the point that Kane wonders if something is wrong with them, and with a dark shadow around their eyes like a bruise that makes him sure. Theyâve got on a long dress, all dark blues and lace and fancy embroidery, the kind of thing youâd either have to be rich to buy or have a lot of spare time to make. Their eyes are a bright, bright yellow, almost glowing, sclera a pale blue, and their hair is the same blue-black as the hair around Kaneâs wrists - oh, itâs the same hair, isnât it? Fuck, itâs long.
âYouâre not supposed to be here,â the guy says again. âYou got, uh. ID? Passport?â
âPassport?â This is - this is insane. This cannot be happening. âWhat the fuck,â he mumbles, repeating it to himself a few times, âwhat the fuck, who - who are you?â
The man tilts his head up with his crowbar. "No, no. I asked you first. You're in my house, I ask the questions." His eyes narrow, almost translucent in the light. "What're you doing here? How'd you find me? You gonna steal shit?" His hand goes to his hair, tugging on the blue-black strands. "Gonna steal my hair?"
"Steal your - why would I steal your hair?" The crowbar is cold against his throat, pressing harder every time he speaks. "And aside from that, I'm not here to steal anything. I thought this place was empty so I could use it for - as a shelter! Happy now?" His tone stays steady, confident even, but his hands clutch at the armrests desperately.
âYou - huh?â The crowbar pulls back, just enough that Kaneâs head can drop, and he sucks in a deep breath while he still can. The crowbar moves away entirely for a moment, as the stranger steps aside to have a whispered conversation with his pet raccoon.
Yeah, this day is weird enough for that to seem normal. Between stealing the princeâs royal helmet, ditching his partner, getting chased by a guard dog, and now this - itâs certainly been a day.Â
While the guyâs busy, Kane glances around, taking in the sights of the tower. Itâs small. Homey. Thereâs a bed, a kitchen, a couch, bookshelves full of video games and a handful of books. The walls are covered, floor to ceiling, in paintings. When he looks up he realizes itâs not just the walls, the ceiling is painted too. Even the furniture has tiny doodles and carvings in it.
The crowbar slides against his throat again, cutting off his train of thought. "Is it just you?â the stranger asks. âNo, uh. Backup? Not gonna...." he trails off, looking at his raccoon again, then back to Kane. "Who are you?"
He gives the man the best smile he can manage, under the circumstances, and says, âIâm Kane. Kane Radio.â
âKane,â the man repeats. Thereâs a long pause where the two of them just stare at each other, before he finally adds, âBenrey.â Suddenly he tugs on his hair, pulling Kane closer to him and pushing the crowbar aside. âI wanna make a deal with you.â
âUhh, yeah, could you get me out of your...hair, first? If that is your hair.â He doesnât have time to make deals, and he doesnât like the way Benrey repeated his name. Could heâŚ.? No, thereâs no way. Kaneâs been careful to erase any trace of Gordon Freeman. Of all people to blow his secret itâs not gonna be some random hermit living in a tower. He swallows, appreciating the lack of metal at his throat. âTo be honest, Iâd rather -â
Aaaand there goes the crowbar again. Shouldnât have gotten confident. "You're lucky I'm gonna let you leave," Benrey says, voice low. Suddenly he doesn't seem like just a weird guy in a tower. Suddenly he seems like a threat. A choked yelp claws out of Kaneâs throat as Benrey tugs on his hair again, pulling Kane close enough that he can see his unnaturally sharp teeth. "Wanna try that again?"
He barely processes the words, focused on the man - man?? - in front of him, the sharp teeth and glowing eyes and the crowbar pressing his throat shut, or maybe thatâs just anxiety. It occurs to him that maybe this guy isnât human.Â
His smile is nowhere near its usual confidence, but he tries to grin anyway. âS-so, uh, what...what was that deal? Benrey?â
Benreyâs face splits into a grin, and suddenly heâs just...a guy again. A weird guy! A weird, unsettling guy, with eyes that are too bright and teeth that are too sharp and hair that is way too long, but a guy. The crowbar is lowered and Benrey steps back, clambering up his fireplace and pulling back a red curtain. Behind it is...a painting? Still semi-fresh, from the looks of it, in the same style that all the other paintings are. This one depicts the floating lanterns they do for the prince's birthday. Thereâs all sorts of colors, blue and silver and pink and green, and below the sky is a hill with a small figure on it with long black hair.
"You know what these are?" he asks, pointing a finger at a pink light.
Kane exhales slowly. Benreyâs gonna push that crowbar against him again any second now, so he might as well enjoy breathing while he can. Fuck, heâd almost rather go back outside and deal with the guard dog that chased him here. âYeah,â he says, voice shaking, and he clears his throat before he continues. âThe lanterns for the lost prince.â Is Benrey fucking with him? Everyone knows the lanterns. Kaneâs never even been to a lantern ceremony himself but he still knows what they are. Heâd need a serious head injury to forget that, and while his head hurts a bit itâs certainly not that bad.Â
Benrey does not seem to be fucking with him, because he does a little cheer and fist pump. âI knew they werenât stars,â he mumbles to himself, before turning back to Kane. Louder, he says, "I want you to take me there. To see 'em." He pulls the curtain back over and jumps down from the mantle, landing on the floor with a heavy thud. "Think you can manage that? Just there and back and I don't, uh. Y'know." He glances at the window. Kane follows his gaze, picturing Benrey launching his body out of it, and shudders. "Pretty good deal, I think."
Kaneâs breath comes out in a panicked hiss.âW-well, that's not really a good idea right now, since I shouldnât show my face in the kingdom right now considering I -" oh shit. "Oh shit. My satchel! Where is my satchel?!"
Benrey raises an eyebrow, smirking at him. âOh, the bag thingy? I hid it. Mine now.â His smug face is the most infuriating thing Kane has ever seen, and heâd be throwing a punch if he wasnât fucking tied to a chair. Benrey continues, "If you want it, you gotta earn it. You take me to the lanterns, I give you your satchel. Deal?"
Hid it. He said he hid it, so itâsâŚ.somewhere in here, probably, and once Kane realizes that itâs easy to figure out. He nods his head at a flowerpot. âItâs in there, huh?â
Benrey raises the crowbar again.
Oh, shit. âW-wait, no no no, no need to hit me!â He shuts his eyes, wishing he could move his arms to protect himself. He does not need any more head trauma, thank you very much.Â
This guy really wonât hesitate to kill him, huh? This stupid deal is his only real option. Kane sighs, keeping his eyes shut. "L-look, I'll keep my eyes shut like this? And you can hide my satchel somewhere else. No peeking. I'll agree to the deal. Just - my head already feels like splitting."
A pause. Kane almost considers opening his eyes but keeps them shut. Finally he hears Benreyâs voice again. âNo peeking,â he repeats. Thereâs a series of shuffling noises, bare feet and raccoon claws against the floor, and then a moment later: âOkay. You can open your eyes.â
The satchel is nowhere to be seen, without even a hint to where it might be hiding. He sighs, head dropping forward before he looks up at Benrey again. "If I'm gonna agree to this, let me ask at least one question. Why do you wanna see them so badly, and why would you need an escort for that?"
Benreyâs face goes blank. âUhhhh,â is all he says, followed by a long pause, leaving Kane worried he broke him somehow, but finally Benrey continues. "That's, uh. None of your business. 's just - it's, uh, dangerous. Out there. For me. Need a....need a guide."
Huh. Sheltered, maybe? Benrey seems...well, a little off, to be blunt. He canât be much younger than Kane is, but he doesnât even know about the lanterns. Overprotective parent seems a likely answer, but whatever the reason, nowâs not the time to pry. âAlright, yeah, none of my business. Okay. We go see the lanterns, come back, you give me the satchel, yeah? Deal?â
âDeal,â Benrey agrees.
âOkay. Does that mean you can untie me now?â
-----
The thing about spending 27 years in a tower, knowing that this is where youâre going to spend your entire life, is that when you get the option to leave itâs kind of the scariest thing imaginable.
Kaneâs already climbed down, leaning against a tree while Benrey stands on the ledge. Physically, heâs ready. Heâs got his hair wrapped around the lever, ready to swing down, ready to go, to get out of the stupid fucking tower and out into the real world, except -
Except -
âYou are never leaving this tower.â Zekiâs hands are on his shoulder, nails digging in. âDo you understand?â
Benrey reaches back, trying to grab at the closet. âBut -â
âThe outside world isnât safe for you. You arenât safe for it. If you went outside, you know what would happen?â
âHuh?â
âLook at you.â She grabs his hand roughly, pulling him over to the mirror. âTheyâll take one look at you, and theyâll know, and then what? Youâll fight back. Youâll hurt people. Youâre dangerous.â
Itâs nothing new, but. He thinks about the man he has stuffed into his closet. He didnât hurt him. Heâll be fine! âBut -â
âThis isnât up for discussion. You. Are not. Leaving. Ever. Do you understand me or not?â
He stares at the mirror, looking between himself and Zeki. Sheâs looked the same as long as he can remember, brown hair always pulled into a bun and dark green eyes, pale skin but not in the same way Benrey is pale. Sheâs human. Heâs not. And sheâs right, that anyone who looks at him is gonna know. Thatâs why heâs up here, where itâs safe. Where no one can hurt him. And, more importantly, where he canât hurt anyone else.
âI understand,â Benrey mumbles.
âGood.â
âI, uh. I thought of - I came up with something better. For a, uh. Birthday thingy.â
Zeki turns away from the mirror, towards Benrey. âOh?â
âYou got me that - the paint. Last year. The white one?â
âThatâs a long trip,â she says, pursing her lips.Â
âI wonât ask about the. The stars. Or going outside. Or anything of that. Iâll, uh -â He glances at the dresser, the one where she keeps her lab coat. âIâll make up for it.â
Thereâs a glint in her eyes, sharp like her favourite knife. âFine. Iâll get you the paint.â Her face softens as she places a hand on Benreyâs head. âIâm only doing this to protect you.â
âI know,â he mumbles, as she steps away to gather her things. âI know.â
âBenrey?â Kane yells. âAre you gonna move or what?â
He jumps.
The fall is intense. Wind in his hair, sun on his face, watching the ground get closer - oh thatâs close. Oh thatâs very close. He stops just a few inches off the ground, hesitating once again. Thereâs no going back from this. The grass is so much greener than he expected, bright and shiny in the sun, drops of dew still lingering, and before he can spiral further he puts his foot down. When nothing happens - no monster appears, no pit opens up and swallows him - he puts both feet on the ground, the blades of grass tickling him.Â
A quick tug, and he pulls his hair down from the lever, watching it fall to the ground, and then joins it. The grass is still damp underneath him, but the sun above is warm. Heâs getting covered in dew and dirt and bits of grass and he canât find it in him to care, busy savoring the feeling heâs dreamed of for so long.Â
Itâs not until he stands up that he realizes the bulk on his hair landed directly on Kane. He starts shoving hair aside, Jefferem lending a set of tiny hands as extra help. âYou good?â Benrey asks, as Kaneâs head becomes visible.
Kane huffs, struggling to stand. âApart from being attacked by your mane, yeah, I'm fine. Can you help me out?â
Benrey holds out an arm. Pulling Kane up proves easier than he thought, and he pulls a little too hard, almost slamming Kane into him, the two of them pressed together for a moment before Kane coughs and steps back. Benrey takes a moment to half-heartedly brush some dirt and grass out of his hair and off his clothes, looking at Kane. âGuide time?â
Kane blinks at him, not bothering to clean off his clothing. âUh - yeah. Guide time. Letâs go!â His steps are loud as he walks away.Â
Benreyâs footsteps are almost inaudible as he follows, crowbar gripped tight in his hands. The initial adrenaline is starting to fade, doubt settling in. Maybe this was a bad idea. Itâs not too late to turn around and go back.Â
He shakes his head. Lost in his own thoughts, heâs fallen behind, and he has to sprint to catch up. Hoping not to zone out again, he starts talking, letting the first thing he can think of fall out of his mouth. âThe lights - the lanterns. You said they were for a...prince?â
They enter a small stone tunnel as Kane answers. His voice is soft. âEvery year, on the princeâs birthday, the kings - and the whole kingdom - release a swarm of lanterns,â he explains, voice echoing. It turns theatrical as he continues. âSee, their little boy was snatched away as a baby, by an evil wizard! Or...something like that, at least. Theyâre hoping the lanterns will bring him back.â
âOn his birthday?â Benrey echoes. Weird coincidence. A moment passes while Benrey busies himself with touching the walls of the tunnel. âAnd they still havenât found him? Whyâre they still doing the lanterns if it doesnât work?â
Kaneâs voice is softer, more subdued when he responds. "The kings still have hope that their baby boy will return someday. It's a very human thing in my opinion."
Ah. Human thing. That explains why Benrey doesnât understand.
Kane pokes his head through the ivy, waiting a moment before ducking back and lifting it to let Benrey through. âWeâre clear.â
Raising an eyebrow, Benrey repeats, âClear?â Is something following them, or is Kane just paranoid? Or maybe Benrey is reading too much into things. Maybe itâs normal to check for stuff like that. Not like he would know.
"Ah - well, I told you earlier, didn't I? The kingdom and I aren't... quite buddy buddy at the moment." As they walk, he keeps looking around, eyes darting back and forth. "But don't worry, it shouldn't be a big problem for our objective."
Oh. Maybe he shouldâve paid more attention to what Kane was saying earlier. Too late for that now, though. âSo I was right? You a little - thief boy, huh? Stealing shit?â Itâs mostly a guess, but he canât picture this guy doing any real crime. His satchel probably had some stolen shit in it and thatâs why he wants it back so bad. Well, better to team up with a criminal than a guard or something, considering all the rules Benreyâs breaking.
âWhy do you keep insisting I steal shit?â Kane asks, looking away from Benrey. He doesnât even give him time to answer, immediately following it with, âHey, you hungry?â
Immediately changing the subject, huh? Now thatâs suspicious. Admittedly he is a little hungry, and curious about where theyâd be getting food out here. âOnly if youâre not gonna steal it.â
Kaneâs mouth screws up, eyes narrowing with a scoff. âI know a good place to get food. On our way, too. My friend works there.â
Oh shit, other people. He hesitates a moment before nodding. âSure. Sure, yeah.â
Kane squints at him again. âYou're not really an outside person huh? Have you...Have you ever been outside before?â
Damn, okay, just gonna straight up ask. Benrey opens his mouth to answer and then stops. âYou answer my question first.â Heâs not looking at Kane as he talks, eyes on the road ahead.
A groan in response, and then, âFine, neither of us get an answer, then.â Kane picks up his pace, quickly getting ahead of Benrey.
âSomeoneâs grumpy,â Benrey mutters, rushing to catch up again. Kaneâs anger surprises him. âI donât care if you are. Iâm breaking like....every rule possible just being here.â He pauses, scuffing at the dirt. ââs all cool. Yâknow. Be gay, do crime.â
Kane bursts into laughter, stopping in the road for a second. âReal rebel, huh?â he asks, shooting Benrey a grin that he returns nervously. âFitting, then, for you to break out with a thief.â
Benreyâs grin widens, delighted. âHah! I was right.â
âYeah, yeah, congratulations, Blueberry.â The smile twists at the corners, as Kane leans closer to Benrey. âBut that means weâre in my business now. So what about yours? You said you're breaking every rule right now. So... you weren't allowed outside that tower for some reason?â
That same empty expression makes a return as Benrey freezes. Twirling a strand of hair around his fingers, he clears his throat, forcing himself to start moving again. Walked right into that one, huh? And heâs not a coward, heâs not gonna refuse to answer after he finally got Kane to admit something. âYeah,â he mumbles. âI, uh. Yeah. Not allowed. Very not allowed.â
If Zeki knew what he was doing right now - sheâd kill him. Worse than kill him. Beside him, Kaneâs gaze is soft, head tilted and eyebrows furrowed.Â
âWellâŚâ he starts, âsometimes, you just gotta do what feels right, even if it hurts or makes someone mad. Trust me on that, I know from experience.â To punctuate his last words, he nudges against Benreyâs arm, almost affectionate. Benrey jumps for a second, hand darting to touch the spot Kane had brushed against, almost expecting it to feel different somehow. But no, itâs just his arm.Â
âExperience,â he repeats quietly. âUh, yeah. I mean - Iâm here.â
âThat you are, Mr. Independent.â
#hlvrai#half life vr but the ai is self aware#benrey#gordon feetman#frenrey#benrey hlvrai#cora writes#tangled au#tangled up#adventures of cora
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⏤ and + combined with frenrey perhaps?? I just need some good olâ soft fluff and kisses from these two..
You got it!
â
Benrey has never been the best with words. Sometimes something will leave his mouth and not even heâs sure what heâs saying. So while what he is trying to voice is concern, instead what comes out is, âYou look like shit, Feetman.â
...Which honestly isnât an unfair statement but Gordon still sends him a look.
âFuckinâ fantastic. Thanks, Benrey.â Sarcasm drips in his voice but thatâs not what makes Benrey wince. Itâs the fact that itâs raspy. If Benrey wasnât 100% sure that Gordon has some sort of cold, he is now.
Gordon sits on the couch, attempting to tie his shoes with unsteady hands. His eyes are half lidded but determined to stay open and his face is off color, nose unusually red. Coughing overtakes him for a moment before he finally finished tying one shoe and moves into the other.
It took him ten minutes to tie the first one. Gordon keeps saying heâs going to go to work. Benrey decides right then and there that he is definitely not.
Moving from the table in the kitchen, Benrey stands next to Gordon, peering down. Orange eyes glance up and huff softly at his expression.
âWhat? Benrey, Iâm kinda trying to go to- to work right now. Iâm- Iâm going to be late.â
Benrey pauses for a long moment. âYeah uh... No.â
Gordon stops and looks up. Eyebrows arch. â...No?â
âYouâre- youâre not going anywhere. Not allowed to be there.â
âI- I have my fuckinâ ID and last time I checked, I donât need a passport.â
âYeah but uh...â Fuck. Benrey quickly says the first thing that comes to mind. âItâs uh- a National Holiday. No work today. Itâs âCringe Men Named Gordon Feetman Arenât Allowed In The Officeâ Day.â
Nailed it.
He gets a scoff in response. âStop fucking with me.â Gordon stands up, wobbling. Benreyâs hands fly out from his sides to steady him. Gordon blinks in surprise and mutters a âThanksâ but still tries to go for the door. âListen, Iâll be back by 5PM. Iâll be fine-â
Benrey is faster- blocking the doorway. âYeah, no. Itâs- itâs like I said. Not allowed in work today. Gotta keep you here. Keep an eye on you.â
âIâm not in the mood for jokes right now.â Gordon says flatly.
âNot- not joking.â Benrey hesitates. âI canât let you leave.â
âOh yeah?â Gordon crosses his arms, eyes challenging him. âGive me- give me one good reason and Iâll listen.â
â...You look like shit.â
Gordon stiffens. â...Iâve gone to work worse before, itâs fine.â
âNo, you-â How does he even say this? Câmon think-pan, do some thinking. âYou got bad uh- bad vibes and you could- could infect everyone else with- with your vibes. And you vibes are just gonna get worse unless you clean âem.â
Whatever he said mustâve worked because Gordon actually goes silent. His eyebrows furrow and he softly asks, âYouâre worried about me being sick?â
Fuckinâ finally. Took him long enough. Benrey doesnât say a word in response. Gordon gets the idea.
âItâs just a cold. I can still work.â
Benrey carefully reaches out and grabs onto Gordonâs hand. He turns them both around and starts to guide him back to his bedroom.
Gordon tugs away but itâs light. Less of trying to break free and more of a small protest. His eyes flutter shut for a moment. âBenrey, I should really get to work-â
âBabe, please.â
Truth be told, Benrey doesnât mean to say âBabeâ. It just kinda slips out. However, what he doesnât expect is the way Gordon responds, eyes snapping open and suddenly dilated. His mouth hangs open but no words come out. Benrey isnât the best at reading situations but he still understands what happens a second later.
Oh. Ohhhhhhh.
Feetman likes pet names, huh?
If Benrey werenât focused on trying to get him to go back to sleep, his heart mightâve been doing funny things in his chest. Or maybe thatâs still happening. Honestly Benrey canât tell, his brain is going haywire, but either way? This is good. This could work.
âYou... You gotta sleep, uh... Sweetheart.â It doesnât matter that Benrey butchers how he says it. Gordonâs arms go slack, no longer silently arguing with him. Holy fuck- who knew Feetman liked this shit so much? Heâs fuckinâ eating it up.
âIâll take care of the whole âWorkâ thing, Babe. Call in or get Bubby to set the place on fire or whateverâs easiest. But uh, you gotta stay in bed while I do that, right? Canât- canât do that if Iâm still thinkinâ youâre out there getting your bad vibes all over the place.â Benrey didnât realize how soft his voice is until he hears it. Almost sounds exactly like heâs trying to coax Joshua into going to bed instead of trying to watch him play video games all night. Shockingly gentle- almost scarily gentle. When did Benrey become so soft?
âOkay.â Gordon says at last. Benrey barely hears him but it sweeps him off of his feet. Fuck. Fuuuck. Feetman does more funny things to his heart. Any more and heâs gonna have to kiss him.
Not right now though. Heâs all gross and sick n shit right now.
...Though a little one on the forehead wouldnât be so bad, would it?
Benrey shakes himself. He sends Gordon a little smirk as they finally reach his bedroom. âFinally. You should listen to me more- I got- I got good ideas too.â
Gordon gives a halfhearted hum in response. Benrey guides him over to his bed where he promptly flops and groans into the covers. Benrey has no idea why but he decides not to ask.
âYou alright, Babe?â
Gordon flips over to face him. Was his face that red before? âStop it. Youâre weaponizing that word.â
âJust trying to get a bro to sleep.â
âBros donât call other bros âBabeâ. Thatâs- thatâs not a thing.â
âBros call Bros whatever they wanna be called. And you uh- you really liked being called âBabeâ so what can I say. Your fault.â
Gordonâs face somehow manages to flush even more. Benrey canât tell if itâs the cold or not but he suspects something else is at play. Heâll deal with that thought later.
âShut up.â His voice is muffled when he starts to bury himself in the covers again. âYou canât bully me when Iâm sick- thatâs not fair.â
âNah. Itâs fair when youâre being a dumbass ân trying to go to work when you look like shit.â
âJust-... Go grab me some cold medicine or something.â
Benrey gives him a grin, even if he canât see it. âWhatever you say, Babe.â
Benrey doesnât miss the high pitched sound that Gordon makes when he thinks Benrey is out of range to hear it.
â
This was veryyyy fun, thank you for the request! Hopefully itâs to your liking!! Feel free to request more!
#hlvrai#half life vr but the ai is self aware#benrey#hlvrai gordon freeman#frenrey#my fic#my drabble#ask#ask game#ask meme#SB Speaks#SB Writes
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Good Jokes
Chapter 2
The Resonance Cascade hurt. Tommy felt the dimensional rift tear open space as if it were a hole punching through his own body. Even with his limited power there was no way he could have stopped something so catastrophic from happening. By the time the convulsions died down, the monsters had already hopped the gap.
Black Mesa was buckled and warped like a Coke can left in a freezer. Tommy wound up somewhere further away from the blast than he anticipated and had to pick his way through the wasted hallways to get back to the explosion site. What a mess. He passed the bodies of humans and extraterrestrials alike, fighting down a growing sense of nausea as he went. Did Benrey do this? It seemed like a stretch, even for him.
Tommy eventually found Gordon, alive and relatively unharmed, and learned that Gordon had picked up three others on his way out of the test chamber. Benrey was unkillable, as was his nature, so that presence didnât surprise Tommy. Dr. Coomer was always tough, and it stood to reason that he could survive the blast from an interdimensional anomaly. Bubby, well. He wasnât dead anymore, was all Tommy knew.
Now, they were trucking through the test facility at a steady clip, picking off creatures as they went. Tommy wasnât armed - he didnât need to be - but Gordon was making decent headway with a crowbar and Bubby had⌠located a revolver somehow. Tommy had questions about Bubby. For now, however, he was hanging in the back of the group, keeping one eye on Benrey, because Benrey was always up to something, and one eye on Gordon, because, well, just look at him.
The elevator crash had shoved him off a cliff he was never climbing back up from. That was a hard thing for Tommy to watch; aside from witnessing the death of three strangers, he also had to see something small and fragile snap inside Gordon, like the breaking of a flower stem. He hadnât killed those people, not really, but he believed that he did, and that was somehow worse. Tommy didnât say anything. He didnât know how to tell Gordon that a lot more people would die before this was over.
To make things worse, the company they kept was slowly chipping away at Gordonâs sanity. Bubby was insufferable. Coomer was unhelpful. Benrey was⌠flirting with him. Indistinguishable from harassment, which Tommy knew from firsthand experience. The new guy needed someone in his corner. It may as well be Tommy.
Gordon was at least adjusting relatively well to the supernatural. He had gotten over the idea of aliens invading pretty quickly, and when Bubby had outright told him he was born in a tube in the lab, Gordon took it in stride. That was right before he had clapped a heavy hand on Tommyâs shoulder, sending a shiver all the way through his body.
Wow, that was nice. Been a long time since Tommy felt something like that. He almost forgot to be offended when Gordon jokingly said that he was five. âWe love our little Tommy,â Bubby had commented sarcastically. âWe love Tommy,â Gordon had agreed genuinely.
Tommy didnât know what to think about that, his brain glitching out in a pleasant sort of way with Gordonâs hand still on his shoulder. Then he let go and they kept moving, leaving Tommy just standing there, pulse on the uptick.
Get it together, man. You have an apocalypse to deal with.
A brief raid of the break room brought back memories of that morning. Was it really just that morning? The past few hours had felt like days. There wasnât a lot to be found in there except the drinks from the vending machine. Tommy hung back while his colleagues pawed through the drawers and cabinets.
Gordon glanced at the bulletin board and over to Tommy, flashing a smile of acknowledgement. Tommy returned it with a wordless raise of his eyebrows. So he still had a sense of humor in this nightmare. That was a good sign.
The eye contact between them lingered for far longer than was appropriate. Take a picture, baby, itâll last longer, was what Tommyâs brain said. âGrab a soda, itâll help you see faster,â was what came out of his stupid mouth. Nice one, genius.
The laugh Gordon barked out seemed to surprise him. It was tight with stress, but his smile was lovely as ever.
âI donât know what that means,â he chuckled, hefting the crowbar in his hand, âbut sure.â
He really didnât know what the hell Tommy was talking about and he still laughed at the bullshit he blurted when his brain stopped working. Tommy smiled and shook his head. He was definitely keeping this one.
The vending machine was cracked open like a walnut and they continued on their way.
It became an unspoken game between the two of them. Who could break the other out of reality, startle them into joy at the end of the world. Tommy won points the most often - Gordon wore his emotions on his face and he was already so strung out from stress that the barest attempts at levity set him off laughing. Occasionally, though, Gordon caught Tommy off guard with his wit. His jokes were more orchestrated. Grandiose. Special presents just for Tommy.
One such occasion was after theyâd broken into the locker room. After addressing the corpse by the benches, Gordon began rifling through his locker for his passport in a vain attempt to placate Benrey. Tommy watched him carefully as he entered such an enclosed space with the entity. Just in case he tried something. Gordon found his passport, but his attention snagged on a solitary picture frame in the corner.
âThatâs my baby,â Gordon informed the team.
He had a baby? Tommy studied the photo with interest. He didnât strike Tommy as a fatherly person, and the fact that he had a child complicated whether or not he was single. Of course, that wasnât an automatic disqualifier -
âI have a son,â Gordon insisted, with emphasis.
Tommy belatedly realized that Gordon was staring straight at him as he pointed at the photo. He blinked. Okay, man. He got the hint. Gordon wasnât on the market - wait.
That was a stock photo. He could see the watermark stamped across the image. Gordonâs stare was still locked onto Tommy, a barely contained smile crinkling the corners of his eyes.
âThatâs Joshua,â he said.
Tommy had to duck into the adjacent room to laugh.
Damn, he was good. Tommy leaned one hand on the wall, holding the other against his ribs in a fit of giggles. Why did Gordon have that in there? Just for kicks? He distantly heard an  oblivious compliment Dr. Coomer launched in Gordonâs direction and a caustic insult from Benrey.
âWhat did you say about my boy?â Gordon demanded in mock outrage. âDid you call him shit?â
Tommy sagged against the wall, catching his breath. It took him a couple seconds to recover from that one. What a knockout.
---
It turns out Gordon Freemanâs sense of humor is difficult to nail when one is enduring an extraterrestrial apocalypse. Shambling forms accosted them on all sides, and while the party was able to more or less hold their own, the tension in the air was palpable. Each member of the team was paranoid for their own reasons, making their words sharper, their actions heavier.
Benrey had disappeared shortly after after the explosion in the bathroom, and Tommy could see him flickering on the edges of his vision every once in a while. Creep. Heâd turn up eventually, on his own terms. Tommy had learned by now that there was no making the entity do what he didnât want to do, but his presence nearby still made his skin crawl.
Dr. Coomer was on edge as he came face to face with his doppelgangers throughout the maze of carnage. Tommy had put together that this man was either a clone or a base for one, and it was becoming increasingly apparent as his speech grew more and more incomprehensible. Gordon thought he was having a stroke once. It was probably more accurate to say that he was having a breakdown on the DNA level.
Gordon and Bubby were the only two who seemed legitimately concerned about the aliens that were steadily pouring into the facility. Bubby was a surprisingly excellent shot with the revolver, and while Gordon wasnât exactly a deadeye, he could at least swing that crowbar around with a decent amount of wallop. The adrenaline was running hot through all of them as they lay waste to the creatures in the facility. This was dangerous, and everyone was on edge.
As the situation grew bleaker, Tommy found himself cracking jokes reflexively, just as a nervous tic. He was used to having a pretty good grasp on reality - or, at least, on his definition of it - but the Resonance Cascade had dropped him in an inkwell and he could no longer tell which way was up. What parts of the impossible were planned? What parts of it could be stopped?
Most of his jokes were ignored by his nervous teammates. Understandable. When he dramatically bemoaned the loss of his tic tac drawer and the crucial calories they contained, he wasnât even sure if he was being serious or not. They had seen so many people die in such a short amount of time. Watching the groupâs brittle humanity crumbling apart at the loss of life was not making it any easier.
When the four of them witnessed a stranger plummet from a precarious catwalk to the void below, Gordon stood there, staring at the place he had disappeared from, for quite a long time. Tommy hung back as he always did, leaning his shoulder on the doorway. This poor mortal with a too-big heart. He was not going to be the same if he made it out of this ordeal alive.
âHow deep is that hole?â he finally asked, either to find a sliver of hope that the man was still alive or some comfort that he had died quickly. âHow deep is that hole?â
Beside him, Bubby folded his arms and blew out a breath. âUh, I believe this hole has to be about five hundred feet deep,â he guessed.
Gordonâs face went worryingly blank as he processed this. Tommy watched him, feeling a twinge of sympathy tug at his stomach. There was no solace to be found in the catastrophe tearing through the facility, especially when the facility itself was grown from such rotten roots. Things were about to get far worse before they got better.
âWeâre trying to dig to the center of the earth,â he told him wryly.
Gordonâs responding laugh was heartbreakingly sour.
They moved on, and Tommy was about to follow the group when Benrey materialized beside him. He only came up to Tommyâs shoulder where he stood next to him, but he still managed to pull off an intimidating leer.
âDude, quit hitting on the new guy,â he said thinly. âYouâre embarrassing yourself.â
Tommy paused. Slanted Benrey a stare that could cut glass. âMaybe you should take your own advice,â he muttered.
âIâm not hitting on him,â the entity shot back. âI canât stand him.â
Tommy narrowed his eyes. Sure.
âItâs not my fault he showed me his dick,â Benrey went on, crossing his arms. His voice was like a razor, and it set Tommyâs teeth on edge.
He drew in a long, slow breath through his nose. âWhy,â he asked, âwould you tell me that.â
Benrey grinned, sharklike, and shrugged innocently. âJust something to think about.â
He blinked out of existence, leaving Tommy there alone to frown at nothing. He scoffed. Asshole. No tact whatsoever.
The fact that the entity had his eye on Gordon, too, made him uneasy. Not enough that Tommy felt the need to interfere - anyone with half a brain cell would know not to trust Benrey and Tommy was certain that Gordon had at least two. But he could see him slowly chipping away at the new guyâs sanity, piece by teeth-grinding piece.
The being had no appreciation for subtlety; winking in and out of this plane, killing indiscriminately, parading around like an interdimensional peacock. Tommy watched it all with a growing sense of disdain. That kind of power was not something to be fucked around with, and that was all Benrey ever did.
Tommy and Benreyâs relationship was like a careful dance in a room full of knives, each step a decision that could help or hurt both of them. They shared a supernatural origin, but their similarities ended there. Tommy didnât trust him one iota, and Benrey vacillated rapidly between being obsessed with Tommy and outright despising him.
He had to remind himself that while the entity rarely outright lied, his words were often so ridiculously, insufferably cryptic that he might as well have been dishonest. The piece of information he had just dropped could mean anything, deposited in such a way to needle against Tommyâs skin like sandpaper. This was how Benrey worked, feeding people bullshit just to get them riled. Tommy didnât need to retaliate. Unlike Benrey, he was raised with some fucking manners.
He had no power over him as long as he didnât let it get to him.
He wasnât going to let it get to him.
Oh, who was he kidding? It got to him. Tommy made a mental note to let an industrial door slide shut on Benrey the next chance he got. What was it going to do, kill him?
Chapter 1 <-----> Chapter 3
#ink#fanfiction#good jokes#part of my endeavor to relocate all my ao3 work#violence#guns#blood#hlvrai
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